Has anyone else seen one of my favorite Steve Martin movies, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels? If it weren't for that movie, I might have forgotten that Oklahoma even existed... Martin plays a con-man, and in one part of the movie he plays a semi-retarded character (Ruprecht the Monkey Boy) who needs a cork on his fork and an eye-patch to keep from poking his eye out...So, I was a bit dumb-founded when reading this info coming out of Seattle:
Apparently, the group that bought the Seattle Supersonics has had an evil plan of moving the team from the great Northwest to... Oklahoma City!!!
Now, correct me if I am wrong... they still ride horses and shit there, don't they? I mean, am I crazy here to think there are enough people in the middle of nowhere to support an NBA Franchise?
OK, forget the fact that Charlotte and Milwaukee both have teams... they both suck. I guess having a team in Oklahoma City will get the redneck fans into the league. I can see it now... a stadium packed with cowboy boots, 10-Gallon hats, and big belt buckles... are we sure this isn't a rodeo?
Let's see... http://www.wikipedia.com/... hmmm... well, who knew? Apparently Oklahoma City is the 30th largest city in the country! Well, good for you Opie! I guess these Oklahoma money men would rather have their team close to home, NOT making money, than in a metropolitan area of over 3 million people... go figure... See, this is why I'll never be rich... I would NOT do stupid shit like put an NBA franchise in Oklahoma...
Dumbasses...
More news on the bridge collapse in Minneapolis... another head scratcher here... they are saying that pigeon dung led to advanced rusting of the bridge and MAY have led to the collapse.
WOW!
I guess we are really pulling out all the stops to point the finger somewhere, huh? I guess New York and Chicago are pretty much screwed as all our bridges must be ready to crumble. Anyone that has spent any time in those cities knows what pigeons are... rats with wings, folks.
I remember walking down LaSalle Street in Chicago one day... a Pigeon was flying right at me... I figured, "I'm 6'2"... solid like a brick wall over here... no way that pigeon ISN'T going to alter it's course..." Well, i was way wrong... it was like a Kamikaze dive bomber... hit me right in the middle of the chest. At least a half dozen folks stopped and stared... we were all like, "Holy Shit! Did that pigeon just fly right into your chest???"
Pigeons are crazy... point taken... maybe they have some sinister plot to collapse all the bridges in the world and shit on our heads as we are all panicked and sitting in traffic. Who knows?
Or maybe... just maybe... they are Al Qaida pigeons...
Dangerous thoughts folks...
I'm locking my doors... see you Monday...
goddam pigeons...
Heitz... Out...
No comments:
Post a Comment