so, I am SOOOOOOO ready to get my lanky butt out of the office for the weekend and like time has stopped... So I hit some news feeds... check this out...
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26901780/
Just thinking out loud on this one but if I were planning on invading a country, I'm starting with the Ukraine. Seriously... they let pirates off the coast of Somalia hijack a ship with 33 Russian tanks onboard as cargo!!! 33 tanks! You know, the ones that shoot huge bombs and blow shit up!!! PIRATES took them!!! We're talking Captain Jack Sparrow now has his hands on 33 Russian tanks!!! un-frikkin-believable!!!
The report says that the pirates didn't know what kind of cargo was on the ship, but I'm thinking if I was transporting 33 tanks along with parts and ammo for them, I might want to have some dudes armed to the teeth protecting my investment!
So, now we have a bunch of Somali-Scallywags with Russian tanks. And the article says they will have a hard time selling them... uhhhhhh... HELLO!!! ever stop to think who we are talking about here? They'll roll them on land and use them to kill stuff and blow things up you dumb-asses!!!
Seriously... I'm invading the Ukraine like next Tuesday if anyone wants to tag along.
And then the FDA warned US citizens not to consume Mr. Brown coffee products... Seriously? Mr. Brown??? Is this the same Mr. Brown that put all our favorite rock-stars in rehab or the one that leaves a stain in your drawers??? Who the hell comes up with these brand names anyways??? I saw a commercial last night for something called the Snuggie. It's basically a monk's robes... or better yet, it really looks like the robes you see cult leaders wearing as they lead their flock to the Mothership. Anyone seen the Family Guy episode with the guy in the White Robe (season 1, episode 3)? Seriously, same damn thing! All these ridiculously happy people holding kids and pets and shit in their big death robes. Crazy! I shot Diet Coke out my nose when I saw it!
http://www.getsnuggie.com
I guess I don't really need to know who buys this stuff but at 2 for $19.95 I'm sure there are plenty of people that will suck down some Kool-Aid and wake up in a better place. I say Good Riddance!!!
Peace out
Heitz
Friday, September 26, 2008
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Don't get pulled over in W.VA.
No lie... this shyt is true -
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26877682/
As I pointed out on my Facebook profile the other day, West Virginia is pretty wacked out. this guy, pulled over for a DUI scooted his chair over and farted, waving the aromatic smells in the direction of the arresting officers. They slapped a Battery charge on him!!!
So, when I was a kid and my dad sat on my chest and tickled me and accidentally let one loose... I could had him hit with Assault & Battery, right??? I mean, shit man, I was ABUSED!!!
Needless to say, the only time I will spend in West Virginia is when my plane is flying over on my way somewhere less shitty.
Other fun headlines this week:
Clay "Yes He is Still in the News" Aiken... apparently some folks weren't aware of his gayness, so they had to announce on the news that YES he is in fact gay. I mean, forget the fact that he dresses way better than me, has great skin, and sings like really NON-manly songs (eg, AC/DC, Metallica, etc...). How else would we have figured it out??? I should ask some of my gay friends... they'd be like, "oh, hells yeah he's a fairy!" Not a very good kisser I'm guessing which is why he feels the need to advertise his homosexuality to those that might not have been aware. Must've burned too many bridges with his lack of ability so he's looking for some new hook-ups.
How about the $700,000,000,000 bailout President Bush and Congress are mulling over for the financial industry? Saw an interesting comment about taking that money and just giving it to the taxpayers... I like it... let's say there are 200,000,000 taxpayers (totally guessing there, may be more, may be less)... That would be $3,500 each!!! Ya know what I could do with $3,500??? How about paying off two credit cards that are about to jump to collection because I went from 6 figures to NO figures due to the crisis at hand??? Right off the bat we could help the people that need it most (us poor taxpayers!!!) and I'm sure the fact that people paying some of their bills would make this financial crisis look MUCH better... just a hunch...
Lindsay Lohan is gay??? Whatev... see same reasoning for Clay Aiken except she's hot. Who cares... all those Hollywood starlets are at the very least BI so who gives a shit if one says they are full-fledged gay? Like that makes me think she isn't hot anymore? Seriously, do the news feeds really need to fill my Inbox with this crap?
alrighty then...
time to get back to work... full weekend on tap so I gotta make a few biscuits in the basket before tomorrow!
peace out
heitz
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26877682/
As I pointed out on my Facebook profile the other day, West Virginia is pretty wacked out. this guy, pulled over for a DUI scooted his chair over and farted, waving the aromatic smells in the direction of the arresting officers. They slapped a Battery charge on him!!!
So, when I was a kid and my dad sat on my chest and tickled me and accidentally let one loose... I could had him hit with Assault & Battery, right??? I mean, shit man, I was ABUSED!!!
Needless to say, the only time I will spend in West Virginia is when my plane is flying over on my way somewhere less shitty.
Other fun headlines this week:
Clay "Yes He is Still in the News" Aiken... apparently some folks weren't aware of his gayness, so they had to announce on the news that YES he is in fact gay. I mean, forget the fact that he dresses way better than me, has great skin, and sings like really NON-manly songs (eg, AC/DC, Metallica, etc...). How else would we have figured it out??? I should ask some of my gay friends... they'd be like, "oh, hells yeah he's a fairy!" Not a very good kisser I'm guessing which is why he feels the need to advertise his homosexuality to those that might not have been aware. Must've burned too many bridges with his lack of ability so he's looking for some new hook-ups.
How about the $700,000,000,000 bailout President Bush and Congress are mulling over for the financial industry? Saw an interesting comment about taking that money and just giving it to the taxpayers... I like it... let's say there are 200,000,000 taxpayers (totally guessing there, may be more, may be less)... That would be $3,500 each!!! Ya know what I could do with $3,500??? How about paying off two credit cards that are about to jump to collection because I went from 6 figures to NO figures due to the crisis at hand??? Right off the bat we could help the people that need it most (us poor taxpayers!!!) and I'm sure the fact that people paying some of their bills would make this financial crisis look MUCH better... just a hunch...
Lindsay Lohan is gay??? Whatev... see same reasoning for Clay Aiken except she's hot. Who cares... all those Hollywood starlets are at the very least BI so who gives a shit if one says they are full-fledged gay? Like that makes me think she isn't hot anymore? Seriously, do the news feeds really need to fill my Inbox with this crap?
alrighty then...
time to get back to work... full weekend on tap so I gotta make a few biscuits in the basket before tomorrow!
peace out
heitz
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Hmmm, digging this lunchtime thing
Wow, having a normal job again is kinda cool... Eat my lunch, digest a bit... blog a bit... think about what I will have for dinner.
Is this how the rest of the world operates??? SHYTE!!! I should been doing this years ago!
So, I was curious about the Republican's bringing the Alaskan governor, Sarah Palin into the mix with McCain. Now, a few months back, I got onto USA Today's web-site and they had some thing where you answer a bunch of questions and it matches you up with the best candidate for you. Now, I got matched with some goof from Alaska (can't even remember his name... he's in my blog somewhere) instead of Obama... of course, Obama was like a close 2nd or third or something...
Anyhoo... so I'm thinking about it this morning while watching Pelicans and stuff dive bomb for fish... what ever happened to that guy? How is it that the 2nd place person is not automatically put up as the VP candidate??? Looking at the democrats, we'd then have another four years of Hillary in office... but what the hey, right?
So it just struck me as interesting that we get these relatives unknowns in the mix suddenly. I mean, it's obvious that Palin is in there to try and counteract the possibility of a Black President. Ask the voters in West Virginia, a historically Democrat state, which is worse in their minds, a Black President or a female VP... That state has suddenly become Republican...
crazy bigots...
So, I guess I'm just hoping enough of the folks like me (educated, white, good looking) that say they are behind Obama, are REALLY behind him and get their butts out there and vote! I've already sent off my updated voter registration since I moved so I'm solid.
Other than that, what else is new??? oh yeah, the Bears suck ass, the Cubs have locked up home field advantage, and people are killing school kids in Finland.
Something else I came across this morning on Yahoo! Sports... check it:
Stunned by two gut-wrenching losses, Philip Rivers, LaDainian Tomlinson and the rest of the Chargers raced past nemesis Favre and the New York Jets for a 48-29 victory Monday night in a wild game befitting two original AFL teams.
I'm gonna just ask the obvious question... and being a Bears fan, I am insulted by this statemtent because Brett Fav-ruh was MY nemesis... not some octopus eating Charger fan surfing to work every day. So exactly when did Fav-ruh become the Chargers nemesis? I mean seriously, I don't even know when the last time he played the Chargers was! Are they saying that since he is a first ballot hall of famer that he must be EVERYONE's nemesis???
Seriously, someone make sense of this for me... I had a Nutty Bar for lunch and I think the lack of nourishment is really impeding my thought process.
Peace out...
Heitz
Is this how the rest of the world operates??? SHYTE!!! I should been doing this years ago!
So, I was curious about the Republican's bringing the Alaskan governor, Sarah Palin into the mix with McCain. Now, a few months back, I got onto USA Today's web-site and they had some thing where you answer a bunch of questions and it matches you up with the best candidate for you. Now, I got matched with some goof from Alaska (can't even remember his name... he's in my blog somewhere) instead of Obama... of course, Obama was like a close 2nd or third or something...
Anyhoo... so I'm thinking about it this morning while watching Pelicans and stuff dive bomb for fish... what ever happened to that guy? How is it that the 2nd place person is not automatically put up as the VP candidate??? Looking at the democrats, we'd then have another four years of Hillary in office... but what the hey, right?
So it just struck me as interesting that we get these relatives unknowns in the mix suddenly. I mean, it's obvious that Palin is in there to try and counteract the possibility of a Black President. Ask the voters in West Virginia, a historically Democrat state, which is worse in their minds, a Black President or a female VP... That state has suddenly become Republican...
crazy bigots...
So, I guess I'm just hoping enough of the folks like me (educated, white, good looking) that say they are behind Obama, are REALLY behind him and get their butts out there and vote! I've already sent off my updated voter registration since I moved so I'm solid.
Other than that, what else is new??? oh yeah, the Bears suck ass, the Cubs have locked up home field advantage, and people are killing school kids in Finland.
Something else I came across this morning on Yahoo! Sports... check it:
Stunned by two gut-wrenching losses, Philip Rivers, LaDainian Tomlinson and the rest of the Chargers raced past nemesis Favre and the New York Jets for a 48-29 victory Monday night in a wild game befitting two original AFL teams.
I'm gonna just ask the obvious question... and being a Bears fan, I am insulted by this statemtent because Brett Fav-ruh was MY nemesis... not some octopus eating Charger fan surfing to work every day. So exactly when did Fav-ruh become the Chargers nemesis? I mean seriously, I don't even know when the last time he played the Chargers was! Are they saying that since he is a first ballot hall of famer that he must be EVERYONE's nemesis???
Seriously, someone make sense of this for me... I had a Nutty Bar for lunch and I think the lack of nourishment is really impeding my thought process.
Peace out...
Heitz
Monday, September 22, 2008
Lunchtime Blog
ok, taking a moment to get some thoughts together while my body tries to figure out what to do with two Hot Pockets, a bag of Cheeto's, and a Diet Coke.
Seriously, why bother with a Diet Coke in this case... I just knocked 3 months off my life so what does it matter if I gain a pound???
So, I started a new job a couple weeks ago... back to being a Geek. Happy with that... I like being the SME... "Where's the SME?" RIGHT HERE!!! Anyhoo, I've got a little commute of about 18 miles each way, across the Courtney Campbell Causeway (nice little bridge with Pelicans, dolphins, etc... cool scenery) and there are a couple little things that bug me. Anyone that knows me knows that it's always the stupid little things that get under my skin. I don't sweat it, it just irks me and I wanna smack someone with my brass knuckles.
I am not a speed freak... BUT, if the posted speed limit is 60 MPH, get yer ass to at least 60, right? Am I wrong to expect that someone might actually attempt to get close to the posted limit? Sure, plenty of folks are gonna blast past you at 80, but the ones that bug me the most are the ones that will roll along at 52, or worse yet... the ones that will go 65 one minute, 54 the next, back up to 60, then down to 49... It's frikkin 2008 fer cryin' out loud! EVERY car on the planet comes equipped with Cruise Control. Do we need training on how to set your vehicle at the speed limit and just stay there??? I mean I do my fair share of watching Pelican's plunge into the bay and come up with dinner, but I do it with the cruise control set at 64. WTF!?!?!? is wrong with people???
Other than that, life is good again. The economy sucks ass and I don't care. hmmmm... kinda reminds me of Jimmy Crackin' Corn...
So, I had some friends that were after my opinion on whether the Bears would be able to beat the Bucs this weekend in Chicago. Of course, I am wearing my Bears boxers, Walter Payton jersey, and have my hair dyed orange and blue while watching the game. Naturally I wanted the Bears to win, but I told everyone to put their picks on the Bucs. No clue who was favored or what the line was... wrong kinda gambling for me these days. Some folks thought I was nuts... NVTS, nuts...
Anyhoo, so the Bears proved their ineptitude once again. Forget the fact that they played a great game for the first 50 minutes. Well, except for that one little part about greeting Brian Griese. I think he was a little miffed afterwards that no one came to say "Hello!". He probably wore the same jersey the entire game as there wasn't a grass stain to be seen on it until about 10 minutes to go in the game.
Bottom line, no surprise we lost the game. I cried... I laughed... I wept... I got over it...
Alrighty then... time to get back to work I think. Earn a living... glad I could spend 5 minutes with my peeps. ;-)
Peace out...
heitz
Seriously, why bother with a Diet Coke in this case... I just knocked 3 months off my life so what does it matter if I gain a pound???
So, I started a new job a couple weeks ago... back to being a Geek. Happy with that... I like being the SME... "Where's the SME?" RIGHT HERE!!! Anyhoo, I've got a little commute of about 18 miles each way, across the Courtney Campbell Causeway (nice little bridge with Pelicans, dolphins, etc... cool scenery) and there are a couple little things that bug me. Anyone that knows me knows that it's always the stupid little things that get under my skin. I don't sweat it, it just irks me and I wanna smack someone with my brass knuckles.
I am not a speed freak... BUT, if the posted speed limit is 60 MPH, get yer ass to at least 60, right? Am I wrong to expect that someone might actually attempt to get close to the posted limit? Sure, plenty of folks are gonna blast past you at 80, but the ones that bug me the most are the ones that will roll along at 52, or worse yet... the ones that will go 65 one minute, 54 the next, back up to 60, then down to 49... It's frikkin 2008 fer cryin' out loud! EVERY car on the planet comes equipped with Cruise Control. Do we need training on how to set your vehicle at the speed limit and just stay there??? I mean I do my fair share of watching Pelican's plunge into the bay and come up with dinner, but I do it with the cruise control set at 64. WTF!?!?!? is wrong with people???
Other than that, life is good again. The economy sucks ass and I don't care. hmmmm... kinda reminds me of Jimmy Crackin' Corn...
So, I had some friends that were after my opinion on whether the Bears would be able to beat the Bucs this weekend in Chicago. Of course, I am wearing my Bears boxers, Walter Payton jersey, and have my hair dyed orange and blue while watching the game. Naturally I wanted the Bears to win, but I told everyone to put their picks on the Bucs. No clue who was favored or what the line was... wrong kinda gambling for me these days. Some folks thought I was nuts... NVTS, nuts...
Anyhoo, so the Bears proved their ineptitude once again. Forget the fact that they played a great game for the first 50 minutes. Well, except for that one little part about greeting Brian Griese. I think he was a little miffed afterwards that no one came to say "Hello!". He probably wore the same jersey the entire game as there wasn't a grass stain to be seen on it until about 10 minutes to go in the game.
Bottom line, no surprise we lost the game. I cried... I laughed... I wept... I got over it...
Alrighty then... time to get back to work I think. Earn a living... glad I could spend 5 minutes with my peeps. ;-)
Peace out...
heitz
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)